I don’t know if I can ever have kids… I don’t even know if I can ever have a husband. Jared is sick, and over the past 12 hours I have learned what it will be like to be a mom. If I hadn’t interviened, Jared would still be at home sleeping… probably totally dehydrated and starving with the worst headache and fever ever.

I was so worried about him, I stayed therelast night. He’d wake up every 2-3 hours moaning about his head hurting so badly. One thing I have to say about guys when they are sick… they are so pathetic. 🙂 At first this was cute… but when I had to pack an overnight bag and put his shoes on him… and practically force him into my car… well. Let’s just say, I’m tired. Getting him to take medicine or drink fluids and eat anything is also a pain. But thank goodness… his severe headache is gone. I may go nap. I’m tired.

It’s a Saturday afternoon… fortunately it’s a cloudy day, so I don’t mind being inside working…

My trip to Albuquerque was AMAZING. I love Jared’s parents.. we had a lot of fun! We ate a TON of food and talked a lot. A lot of stories were told over the three days. And Jared and I got to know each other a lot better too… That tends to happen when you live under the same roof with someone. Even if it was only 3 days. Jared and I went on a hot air balloon ride, SO FUN! I think my favorite moment was on the way back up to Colorado, the sun was setting and it was absolutely GORGEOUS. I suggested we stop and watch it, and Jared took the next exit. We sat on the hood of his car and just watched God’s beautiful creation. A perfect end to a pretty awesome couple of days.

Now I’m back in Denver. Yay for reality. Not really. I hate working when I have so much other stuff I should be doing. But I gotta do it. Git ‘er DONE.

In the next two weeks, I have to pack up my apartment and get rid of everything from my life that doesn’t fit into the next “adult” chapter of my life. It’s going to be hard. REALLY hard. I have to be out of my apartment by June 12th, and then I’m going to live in Colorado Springs until I depart for Japan on July 22. It’s coming soon. Kinda scary.

You know what the ironic part is? I never thought I would miss Colorado. I’m not a big mountain person, and I love humidity. But traveling so much over the past few weeks and then coming back to a beautiful green Colorado. I’m really going to miss is when I’m gone.

As for things with Jared… they are good. REALLY good. That’s about all I’m going to say about that.

Cheers

Today is the first day of the rest of my life.

Hard to believe that I am a college grad. I don’t feel old enough to be done with school. The whole ceremony was amazing and surreal. Normally graduation ceremonies are long and dull… but there were fewer graduates this year AND the speaker for the ceremony was FUNNY, and to the point! He was pretty much amazing! I sat there and then walked across the stage. Going through the motions like everyone before me and everyone after me. It still didn’t seem real.

This past weekend I went to Ouray/Ridgeway to help with a 5 high school band festival. All five of these schools came together to play with each other. It was AMAZING. I’ve never had a clearer example of creating music within community can look like. I am in awe of the possibilities. I got to hang with 6 other girls and Mr. Dorn, and probably laughed harder and more frequently than I ever have before.

I’m going home this afternoon. And then I will be leaving tomorrow morning with my dad and we’re driving to Houston. Gonna meet my sister there and fly out of Ft Sam Houston Airport and will be arriving in Roatan, Honduras sometime Saturday afternoon. We are going SCUBA diving!  I’ll be there for a week, and then driving back from Texas with my dad. It’s going to be amazing to get away! When I get back from Honduras, I am going to Albuquerque with one of the most amazing people ever. 3 DAYS and two long car rides. WOW, I must be the luckiest girl EVER.

So bottom line, I’ll be gone for about two weeks before my next update. Try not to miss me too much 🙂 When I get back, I should have the location of where I will be teaching in Japan, so I can update everyone.

It’s raining outside. Gosh, spring is beautiful.

I know I have a heart, because it hurts.

WOW! I just had the most amazing weekend… actually the most amazing Friday EVER. Jared and I drove with Hannah and Emily to Kansas Thursday night. Friday morning began out day of adventure. We had the best Prime Rib EVER for lunch… oh my gosh…. it was great. The lunch was GOOD, but the company was better. Hannah’s parents are hilarious, and her grand parents came over for lunch too. I don’t think I’ve laughed so hard in my entire life. After lunch, we went four-wheeling and hiking for like 3 hours…. Kansas is NOT flat and boring. It’s quite beautiful actually. THEN we got to bottle feed a baby calf, which was pretty much then grossest and coolest thing ever. We all got showered after that and went into town, had dinner… laughed and talked REALLY loud, and then went bowling at this cute 8 lane bowling ally. Hannah will vouch that lane 8 is possesed by satan and only 9 pins will fall at any given time.

Anyway, so it was great. Hannah, I think you are wonderful! i had such a great time!!!

For all of my Japan Team 04, I found this!! I was hoping to be banana Pocky, but it didn’t work out. Does milk Pocky even exist?

You Are Milk Pocky

Your attitude: caring and charming Smooth and silky… invigorating and natural. You are like comfort food for the soul.

Well… the orchestra concert went rather well tonight. I believe it is the best sounding concert that the orchestra has performed EVER. The strings sounded AMAZING. And my solos went well… not perfect, it’s never perfect… but I didn’t mess up. Just left a few notes out… no big deal.

I got to meet Jared’s parents tonight. They are so awesome. I love parents. They were exactly how Jared described them… they remind me a little of my parents. My dad is a little quieter and my mom is more talkative and outgoing. It would be cool to get all 4 of them in a room together. His parents are older… but WAY awesome.

Well, I’m tired. Lots to do tomorrow.

I have a pretty amazing boyfriend. I’m pretty lucky. WOW.

Wow.. I am a Xanga slacker!

As per my mom’s request… and due to the fact that I now have time in which I am not sleeping, studying, writing papers, or spending time with one of the most amazing guys EVER… I am now writing.

The past two weeks have happened very quickly and at the same time… it seems like they’ve lasted forever. Just the ‘Readers Digest’ version of recent events …

School has been crazy. I think I’ve been assigned more group projects, for my two communication classes, than ever before! It makes me tired to think of all the stuff I have to do in order to get my diploma before school gets out. Including CLEPing two classes. BLAH.

On a more positive note.. I’M GOING TO JAPAN! I found out last Saturday that I have been accepted and will be spending the next year (at least) in Japan. WOOHOO!!!!!!!!

This past Wednesday I turned 22 years old… wow. I know it’s not that huge of a deal.. but it’s still getting older. My roommate Megan is the best EVER planning a surprise party for me at Old Chicago. Yeah that was pretty awesome. I got Oreo cookie pants, a cool Spiderman doll that says ” I shoot web” and “Even superheroes need hugs”, cookies and some more cool stuff from Megan.

But the best part of my week? Well, that happened this morning at 2:00 AM. I am now dating an AMAZING man of God, and I’m not ashamed to say… I’ve been pretty giddy all day. Some of you might be asking… “How the HECK is that gonna work with you going to Japan?” Well, the truth of the matter is, I don’t know. All I know is that Jared and I are going to take it a day at a time, and see where it goes. God is so awesome, and I feel totally at peace about this. Which hasn’t been the case in past relationships.

A cool story: So yesterday was my cat, Precious’, birthday. ( She turned 12.) Jared bought my cat presents! He actually admitted to spending more money on my cat’s present than mine. He bought her some tuna flavored cat food, a can of tuna and a green mouse play-toy thing. Jared’s last name is Greene, so it fits. I just thought that was great. Who DOES that kind of thing? hahaha… My boyfriend does, and I think it’s awesome.

In any case, I’m pretty tired. Gonna go chill with a movie.

Ok, so I just had the most amazing weekend ever! I went skiing with my mom and dad at Wolf Creek, and my dad and I did 20 runs in one day!!! My mom was close with 17… but it was pretty stinkin’ awesome!

Other than feeling yucky, yesterday was actually pretty cool. It was a day of going through yearbooks… and I had this weirdo dream this weekend, which is why I started going through my yearbooks. I dreamt about people from middle school , I haven’t even thought about in years. A long story short, I ended up calling two guys ON THE PHONE last night. One was a guy I “dated” for 2 weeks and 2 days.. he remembered that actually. His name is Danny, and i honestly never thought i would ever talk to him again. He had Jimmy’s phone number (a guy I had the hugest crush on in 8th grade) and I ended up calling him and getting caught up with him too.

I can’t explain the awe I was in after talking with these guys. It’s like talking to someone you knew you’d never talk to again. Most times when I remember people from my past, I am forced to think ” wow I miss them, and I wish I could talk to them, but oh well.” and I have to get over it. Last night, I did something about it. You know, it took probably 3 hours to get information that ultimately led to getting Danny’s phone number. And Jimmy had fallen off the face of the Earth to everyone else I’d talked to. God is awesome! I found out they are both still single… ok, that’s the girl in me.

Who knows why people come into and out of our lives. I know that I actively put myself back in Jimmy and Danny’s lives last night, and I don’t think I would ever undo that. I plan on going to Virginia this summer. It’s been too long anyway. Only God knows.

That’s all for now.. time to get to work.

Real life suddenly seems so boring .

It’s over…

We got back Thursday night at 6:30 pm. Now, let me tell the story…

After that last Xanga entry, the tour REALLY began for me. I went with Janet and Megan to Walmart that was just across the street from the hotel. We ran into Andy, who was on his way out of the store… and asked him to come with us. We had SUCH a fun time!!! The kind of fun that you are supposed to have on tour. Andy found a Spiderman® that said different phrases. Two phrases that struck us as really funny were: “I shoot web” and ” Even super heroes need hugs” We used those phrases more times than I can count for the rest of tour.

Megan and I had a homestay that night with the cutest couple ever! They have been married for 50+ years and had been missionaries on a Navajo reservation for 33 some years. They had so many stories.. and I found it very interesting that when they met, they JUST KNEW the other person was “the one” for them. So awesome.

We ate really well on this tour… usually we are provided with spaghetti or lasagna dinners, most churches did a pot-luck type of thing with huge amounts of desserts and carbs 🙂 It made sticking to my diet non-existent.

We spent almost three days in Albuquerque, including our free day. It was great, it was not  Chicago my sophomore year, but it was still pretty awesome. I got to hang out with Hannah, Ben and Trim, (and Arianna and Chris)… more than half of the Japan mission team that went last summer. We played 6 person Spades ♠ for 3 hours! Dinner was cool though… we ate at some Mexican restaurant, and that was the first time I spoke with Jared. Jared and I ended up hanging out a lot on tour, which was really cool. He’s not a person I thought I would ever get to know. He’s pretty hilarious.

From there we drove to El Paso, where Megan and I stayed with Sarah and her family! It was so cool! We played this video game where you sing and the goal is to stay on beat and pitch.. pretty fun! Sarah’s brother Caleb came home… he was pretty cool too. We talked till 2:30 AM… he’s so extroverted with so much energy.

Our day in Juarez Mexico was AMAZING!! It started out kind of slow. Megan, Andy, Chelsea and I all walked around passing out candy to kids in the neighborhood that surrounded the church. After lunch, I helped teach Go Fish to two girls and their mom, with Matt, Sarah and Pat. The two little girls hung out with Sarah and me for the rest of the day.. It was so cool. The concert that we held that night… could have been a disaster. The wind was harsh, it was cold and dusty… but we had our best performance, despite conditions… that we had all tour.
It was hard to leave those little girls… they were so fun! And left more of an impact on me than I ever could have had on them.:) It was pretty amazing that I was able to remember any of the high school/college Spanish I’d learned. God is good. 🙂

The next few days were pretty laid back. We did a lot of driving and only three more performances. Before I knew it, we were driving home. I have never felt the reality of the end before. Mr. Dorn read through the names of the seniors that would probably not be with the band next year. 8 of us total. Most of us seniors cried for at least an hour! Even Daniel!

As we pulled into Denver, and unloaded the bus for the last time, and as I drove home… the minutes increasing between when band tour had finished and the present time… I took a deep breath and thanked God for bringing me to this place. It is a sad thing for good and happy times to be over… but, a good thing to remember that I got to live those times. How blessed I am.

My theme song for my present state of mind…

It’s been a long road
Getting from there to here
It’s been a long time
But my time is finally near
But I can feel a change in the wind right now
Nothing’s in my way
And they’re not going to hold me down no more
No they’re not gonna hold me down

Cause I’ve got faith of the heart
I’m going where my heart will take me
I’ve got faith to believe
I can do anything
I’ve got strength of the soul
And no one’s gonna bend or break me
I can reach any star
I’ve got faith
I’ve got faith
Faith of the heart

It’s been a long night
Of trying to find my way
And through the darkness
Now I’ve finally had my way
I will see my dream come alive at last
I will touch the sky
And they’re not gonna hold me down no more
No they’re not gonna change my mind

I know the wind’s so cold
And seem the darkest days
But now the winds I feel
Are oly winds of change
I’ve been through the fire
I’ve been through the rain
But I’ll be fine

I’m going where my heart will take me
I’ve got strength of the soul
And no one’s gonna bend or break me
I can reach any star
I’ve got faith
I’ve got faith
Faith of the heart

It’s been a long road

-Rod Stewart
“Faith Of the Heart”

Here I am! The first day of band tour!! We are currently in Cortez, CO and will be here until tomorrow morning when we leave. We’ve had one concert so far and it was.. well… not so good. It was actually SO BAD that the only positive thing Mr. Dorn could encourage us with, was that we all looked really good in the debut of the tour shirts. (Polos that were designed by MEEEEE. ) Sad huh? But we have an evening concert tonight, so hopefully we will redeem ourselves.

In our defense, most of us only got about 4 hours of sleep. We were supposed to arrive in Cortez around 11:00 pm and we got a flat tire on the truck carrying all the percussion and sound equipment. Which delayed us, causing us to get in at 12:30am. Blah.

But HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my Mommie!!! She’s old today… just kidding. She’s 45 years young. Love you Mommie 🙂

Onto more tour!!! I don’t know when the next time I will get to update is, but know.. I will as soon as I can.