What is something you sometimes wonder “What if…” about?
I know I talk about it often, but being an Air Force kid was (and still is) a large part of my identity. It shaped a lot of who I am, how I handle new environments and people, and (I’m sure) a fair share of my idiosyncrasies. The thing I often wonder is… what if my family had continued living in (insert one of the places we used to live) instead of moving? What would my life look like now? What kind of person would I be? Of course, that is impossible to know. Each move had its own profound impact on who I turned into as a person as well as this present life I’m currently living.
My parents thought they’d bought the home my dad would retire in… in New Mexico ( when I was in 2nd grade-5th grade). But a few years and a move later, I couldn’t imagine leaving my middle school friends I made in Virginia (6th-8th)… until I did. By the time we made it to San Antonio (9th- first half of 11th), I was beginning to understand how each move meant meeting new people… that I couldn’t imagine my life without. (My mom gave me great wisdom about that.) That made it a bit easier (but not less painful) to move to Colorado (second half of 11th-12th).
And yes… most of what I wonder is friend related, (but not all). How would my friendships have changed over a longer period of time? Would I have been in the same or completely different groups in high school? Would I have loved marching band as much without my ‘Friday Night Lights’ experience in Texas with my band director Mr. Wilson? Would I still like the Denver Broncos if I’d never lived in Colorado? (Honestly, probably not… I’m not a fair weather fan, but wearing orange was an ‘acquired taste’ I had to learn to love.)
If I go back, everything is a domino effect. There’s not one thing I would change about my now… so there isn’t a thing I could change about then. I’m very happy with where I’ve ended up. I don’t ever ‘wonder’ these things too seriously… but when I think about them, I consider myself blessed for the life I’ve had so far… how all the twists and turns landed me here… and I’m grateful.